grudges

why do we hold grudges?
they don't make us happy
they don't make anyone around us happy either
so why hold them?
because we hurt inside?
because we don't have anyone to be happy?
to be miserable just like us?
or do we just want someone to notice us
help us in some way other than pats on the back?
do we just want a hug and someone to talk to us?
to make the pain go away?
why do we hold grudges?
it makes the hole in our hearts grow bigger and blacker
what can we do to make them go away
and fill this empty hole in our hearts?

[sigh]

i have no bloody idea what i'm doing again.
why must this happen to me, i don't like the unpredictable. =(
again, i am troubled with the affections of another and i have no idea what i'm going to do
others have told me to go with the flow, like always, but i have no idea what i'm going to do ><
[sigh]

anywhoodles. happy holidays ^^